Friday, 13 January 2012

Conversations between a comedian and iPhone Siri

Sometimes I wonder why I married the guy I did, and then something like this happens and it all comes back to me.

Scene opens.
Setting: A fairly well kept office room (ahem!).
Time: Evening
Purpose: Procrastrination a.k.a annoy the b'jeezes out of the wife.

DH fiddles around with newly acquired iPhone (supposedly for the wife, a.k.a the author of this blog). Face is lit with happiness that only a new found toy can bring. 

DH to wife: Ey! What is your security code?
Wife: ignores husband and continues to mess around with computer looking all busy.
DH [murmurs to himself]: 3..4..6.. no.. 3..4...2 no...4? noo..
[Succeeds in unlocking the phone and exclaims] :aaaanh!! Got it!

Wife [turns away from Facebook to observe with consternation that DH has indeed unlocked the phone. Something soft touches Wife's arm and she looks back to see that the Cat (Poli Samiyaar) was about to click Like on something she didn't exactly like. Wife picks us Cat and dumps him unceremoniously on the floor while twisting herself into a pretzel to face DH at same time and exclaim]: Why do you have to mess with my phone!

Cat [looking very annoyed]: QUAAAM!

DH [ignores everything going on around him]: I am going to use Siri. Heehee.. See? Siri. Heehehheheh

Wife [rolls eyes at silly pun (siri = laugh in Tamizh) and says nothing, continues to load another CD to import into iTunes]

DH: Hoysala! Hoysala!
Wife: [turns around looking completely mystified]

DH [Motions to wife to shut up and whispers] Shh... let's confuse her.
Wife[Looking all the more bewildered, hitting eject button] Confuse whom?
Cat:[Jumps back a foot as the CD is ejected and exclaims, surprised]: PHRAAMP!
iPhone: I don't know where you are, but if you enable location services and Siri, I can help you.

DH: [Cracks up uncontrollably, rolls his eyes at iPhone and acts like he expects a living thing to come out of it]: hehehehheheheh!
[Gesticulating wildly at Wife]: shhhhhshshhhh!
DH:[to iPhone] Find Hoysala
iPhone: Finding voice la
DH:[guffawing loudly now, with tears streaming from his eyes] Ahahah!!! This thing talks like a Singaporean: finding voice la?! Hahahaha!

Wife:[Completely missing the point of  Siri, but distracted by all the noise] Hey! I don't want you to train that thing to your voice!
Wife:[turns back to computer and opens up blogger]

DH: [Continues harassing Siri]: What is my name?
iPhone: I don't know who you are! But you can tell me... Click Siri Settings and ....
DH: [roars out laughing]

Wife: [returns from kitchen with an apple] What's going on?
DH:[still busy laughing]
Wife:[turns to sit and finds Cat on her chair. Tries to click a picture with her new camera for this post. The picture is lousy because the new iPhone has a flash! Gives up on camera and picks up Cat and for the second time and dumps him on the floor]

DH: [Continues to talk in the background to Siri]:  Where is my dog? 
Dog:[Perks one ear up wondering if the next word would be "park"]
iPhone:[Does not talk but puts up a text message]: I found 6 kennels near you. 

Wife:[Shakes her head and continues to type this post]. 
DH: [Comes up to wife and gives her the phone still laughing] Here have fun with it. Hey! You should blog about this "Top 10 answers of Siri". Ask her 10 questions. Ask her "who am I?" Ask her "who are you"? You had better thank me for the idea and acknowledge me in the blog!
[leaves the room almost falling to the floor clutching his belly]

Hmm.. that's why I married him. Very few people can crack themselves up over so little a matter and crack everybody else up from simply watching him crack up!

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Magicrna said...

your poli samiyar link takes us to WaMu's page...and where is the photo of siri?

Agnija Bharathi said...

Yes, but it is the brining home of Poli story!